You put it in the car with you when you are going to the movies. You tell it:  be quiet now, we are going to have fun it is OK for us to have fun please just sit here I will get back to you later.

You sit across from it while you are eating dinner. You tell it: We are eating dinner now I have to eat. It’s OK for me to enjoy things like cheese sauce and chocolate chips. You are going to have to wait. I cannot cry while I swallow food.

Some days it gets to have all of your time and you cry and cry and cry without a care in the world because no one is around or someone you love very much is around and you both share your time with this Sad and then you get to move on for a moment.

And it is moment by moment like this. You aren’t running from it, you aren’t all consumed by it, it is part of you; it is your partner, it is your new soulmate and it is your new annoying friend because it opens a window for you to see the world so much differently than you ever saw it before.

Photo by Jody Fausett – AMAZING ARTIST!!!

collageart/painting by me💛


  1. I think this is the most healthy thing I’ve read about dealing with grief. You’re doing totally the right thing by recognising the Sad and letting it be there.

    It’ll take however long it takes, and that is absolutely, 100% OK.

    Judy, you’re wonderful, never forget that. Xxxxx ❤ ❤ ❤ ❤

  2. Thanks for writing this. I’m traveling with my mom at the moment. I think she is depressed and I don’t understand why I can’t change it. But maybe just trying to cheer each other up or just being there is helping. I’ve been googling and everything and it’s helping a little. „Living with Sad“ makes me swap perspectives and helps me understand her feelings a bit better.

    1. Omg!!! I just saw this. I’m so sorry I missed it!! I know you’re still with your family in Germany and anytime you want to talk we can talk life is one hell of a fucking roller coaster that’s for sure

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